In 2017, I was struggling to decide whether to do a psychology degree or set up The Weekend University.
This was one of the hardest decisions I’ve had to make, and the thought experiment that follows gave me the clarity I needed to move forward.
If you’re struggling to decide between competing paths in life, give it a go.
Imagine yourself going to a dinner party in the afterlife.
Here, you meet the different versions of your future self that you could become, depending on the decision you make at this point in your life.
For example, if you are deciding between staying in an accountancy job that you hate, or retraining as a psychotherapist, you would envision the person you’d most likely become by taking each path 10 years in the future.
What’s their energy like? How would you describe their personality? What are they telling you about their life?
Once you’ve got a clear picture of each potential future self at the dinner party, you then ask:
“Who do I admire and most want to talk to?”
And:
“Who do I want to avoid?”
The person you’re curious to talk to is usually a good indicator of the right path, whereas the person you want to avoid is usually a warning sign about where a particular course of action might be leading you.
Source: Carpe Diem Regained by Roman Krznaric.
When I tried this exercise, I pictured two future versions of myself:
1.) The psychologist who followed a conventional path.
2.) The entrepreneur who—despite uncertainty—took leaps into the unknown and continuously reinvented himself.
When it was a choice between who I most admired and wanted to speak to, it was the entrepreneur.
However, not long after, a “middle” way occurred to me — a route that would allow me to honour both the psychologist and entrepreneur inside.
It was to move forward with starting the business.
And then to use the profits to fund my education in psychology.
So that became my goal.
This unlocked a great deal of motivation, as both parts of me were now fully engaged with the road ahead. For the first time, I had deep clarity, and I was “all in” for the adventure that awaited.
If you’re struggling to choose between two (or more) competing paths, try these questions:
1.) Who are the different characters present at your Dinner Party in the Afterlife?
2.) Who are you most curious to speak to?
3.) Who do you want to avoid?
4.) Is there a “middle way” that will allow you to leverage the motivation of two of your potential “future selves” towards an aligned long term goal?
